Matsuri - Endship

Matsuri - Endship

Jared Mills - Bass

Jonathan Ruiz - Drums, vocals

Andrew Yeung - Guitar, vocals

Chris Gough - Guitar, vocals

Tomm Nguyen - Guitar, vocals

Open your Chest (Part I)

Walk on kits

We've found you lacking constitution

Tread lightly

It's a shame for all of us who still believe

Wading in stale murky waters his neck stretched towards the sun asking for

A reason to be something; something to die for

Kill or be killed; song to the flock; all he had known in this soft lake bed

Gray silken sheets blanket the roots like ghosts to a past

History told through smoke and gestures

It all seems so rehearsed like we've done this all before

This feeling of failure too strong to ignore

But we can only hope when the day is done

We've filled ourselves with more than anger and remorse

Born into; feed off of; sense nothing; disappear

I've failed everyone

Somewhere there's a cycle - hidden

Life spans across short spectrum; pull the lens back focus

Inhale; so strong, the scent of moss and stone

We've found a place where you feel safe when you're alone

Water lines receding

Plague cultivating population

Mouths eating themselves

Once haven, now sucked bone dry

                The premise of a hunt. The "murky waters", "kill or be killed", "song to the flock", the roots covered in "gray silken sheets", someone being careful about their footsteps, the "short spectrum" of life, "the scent of moss and stone", and the "place where you feel safe when you're alone" are all images that could be associated with a hunter waiting on its prey. The hunter, however, is not the only one that can evolve in a landscape such as the one depicted. The identity of the protagonist is therefore still to be determined.

                Another theme of this setting would be disappointment, as one has been judged as "lacking constitution" by a few peers while others "still believe". The recounting of history "through smoke and gestures" that seem superficial also hints at disillusionment, which is reinforced by the "feeling of failure too strong to ignore". In addition, one filled with "anger and remorse" could hardly be associated with satisfaction, but rather with a certain emotional numbness.

                Combining the idea of someone carefully evaluating the state of their environment to the theme of disappointment directs the thoughts towards a character disapproving of actions perpetrated at some point in the past that deteriorated wildlife. The "murky waters" are soiled. The "gray silken sheets" covering the roots of trees more evocative of death than life. Humans are born in an ecosystem they exploit until it's gone, only to their detriment. A sense of urgency imposes itself as humanity approaches a finish line. The setting of this first part establishes one coming to the realization of the part they have taken in the destruction of their environment. A growing sense of awareness bringing one to a crossroads.

 

Breathe Out your Soul (Part II)

I've been told it's a privilege to live in this cycle

That I ought to be grateful and pay up my dues

And I won't have time to do the things I want to do.

Why don't I believe them?

With pillar arms too rigid to move

Curved figure with a starved eyed gaze

Struggling to straighten the bend in his back

Wanting to uproot but so set in his ways

A curved femur bone leaves him walking in circles

A tug of war between useless limbs and casted hearts

On one side a shadow on the other a ghost

No winners here just an excess of parts

Broken telephone lines; parasites with no hosts

Daniel, son

Stone swan amongst thieves

Take to the skies and leave them behind

No heroes falter

 

                The second reference to a "cycle" in only two songs, combined to the mention of this being a second part, has the idea that a conducting thread may lay hidden throughout the whole. In Open your Chest (Part I), the cycle was hidden, only supposed at. In Breathe Out your Soul (Part II), the cycle is used as a less intangible location.

                One is incredulously questioning the comment originating from people described as having "pillar arms too rigid to move" and bent backs. The same people are assessed as being unable to change, "walking in circles", "useless limbs", waste of humanity, and "thieves". Unconvinced of their desire to contribute to a cause alongside such individuals, one advises their son, Daniel, now described as a swan, to attempt an escape and take flight.

                The absence of details in the judgmental perspective adopted, however, hints at a shaky foundation. The source of the condition of those deemed to be failures is identified as being habitual. Complacency has paralyzed everyone in sight to a point where progress cannot be achieved. The ability to elevate is categorically denied and placed out of reach, as one observes that there are "no winners here just an excess of parts". The reaction that gave rise to the judgement, however, may lie in the idea that the patronizing comment may have its origins in someone perceived as a failure. Success would be equaled to appearing to use time in a much more constructive way. Anything less amounts to a waste of resources, as the effort to "straighten the bend in his back" is acknowledged but does not allow sufficient recognition to generate empathy or compassion. Hence, the world depicted is divided into two opposite camps -both disapproving of the other, unable to communicate. Conflict emerges.

                After establishing a disappointed character in a devastated landscape as a setting, as well as war on the horizon, the suggestion to depart foreshadows the next phase in the evolution of this tale.

 

Cling to your Lungs (Part III)

Open your chest breathe out your soul

Cling to your lungs and love what you hold

The salesmen will leave and bridges will fall

But if hands will be strong we can break down these walls

 

                A culprit revealed in the form of corporate interests. Life and love in opposition to financial benefits and the division it generates. The "salesmen" are not part of one's ideal world, just as certain "bridges". The breaking down of walls is evocative of dismantling barriers and being rid of artificially created limitations. Once these obstacles are taken down, a connection is allowed to occur, with unity as a result. The symbolic value of a bridge could be established as one of facilitating connection. Therefore, the use of the word in this context appears to refer to its literal sense. A very black and white perspective. The identification of the enemy and the absence of contrast is setting up the process of polarization.

                The lack of reference to the theme of the cycle, as was present in the first two songs, introduces an attitude in the protagonist: an attempt at breaking said cycle out of disapproval. At its first appearance, the cycle is associated with a trap for people to fall into, which would prevent them from making a righteous life. At its second appearance, the cycle is presented as a backdrop to a projected ingratitude. With such dangerous connotations, it is hardly surprising one should recommend a careful watch be kept of the concept.

                The first two lines of this third part ring as instructions before taking off in a plane or a ride. As the buckling of seatbelts and keeping your hands and limbs inside the vehicle at all times, the opening of the chest and the firm grip to be kept on one's lungs are formulated in a way indicative of events set in motion. The remaining two lines qualify the objective with encouragement, a resounding call to arms empowering a struggling community in their reaction.

Love What you Hold (Part IV)

It's not as easy as it used to be

I can't face my fear

I know this is nothing that you're used to

I still feel your hands around my neck

But it feels like my heart's so far from home

There's no need for the sky when we never look up

Like asking trees to reach for the stars to grow in the night

These trees grow on rot instead of roots

Land lays unhinged revealing what we let happen

Let's head westward where land is still green

We'll build sunburn city; we won't have to worry

None of this matters much, no point to be concerned

We'll build sunburn city; we won't have to worry

We'll live our lives cautiously without excitement

We'll build sunburn city; we won't have to worry

Disregard the promises of adventure

It's getting hard to breathe in these walls

She's not breathing

Did I build them myself?

Or did I build them with her?

Says Daniel to the flock

We'll be happy. Let's go. Hurry

Open air slips by under ruffled feathers wide

Never wandered so far

Everything is exactly the way it has to be

I've learned to face my fear

I know this is something you'll get used to

I still feel your arms around my neck

 

                The devastation described furthermore. Fear, suffocation, alienation, restlessness... One realizes the absurdity of a life in the shadow of death. The reaction resonates with a known history: looking West for greener pastures and the promise of happiness. This just might be satire. The spreading of civilization and its toll on Nature as if the ultimate aim was the eradication of every single inch of life. On the other hand, as guilt is admitted and immediately followed by a proposition to move further to the West, a question regarding the cyclical nature of history imposes itself. Contaminated, as one who has taken part in the destruction causing the consideration to depart, the inherent risk lay in infecting other lands and widening the spread of the proverbial disease. However, it may be argued that the illumination and disassociation symbolize an ongoing healing process.

                The character of Daniel makes a second appearance, as part of a flock, suggesting a second person type of narration. The testimony exposed so far transforms into a bird's eye view, an idea emphasized through the use of the words "sky", "flock", "open air", and "feathers". In this perspective, overcoming fear describes a flock taking flight, reaching for liberty.

                A certain sense of expectation also transpires, as one expresses how ironic it may be to expect growth from a place devoid of the required conditions. Any exclamation at the moment of facing the results of this process amplifies such a nature. Simultaneously, in an established combat setting, these ideas may characterize the one making the comments as a jaded soldier. In the face of fear, moving towards greater freedom, relying on images of home to get through a tough time, a focus on the ground level, the promise of adventure, daydreams of a better place, could all be associated with someone hidden in a trench.

                The allusions to a changed state as the protagonist assesses things to be harder than before, with a remaining impression of still being held by the throat, confirm an evolution in setting. This is also supported by the homesickness expressed. The progress brought to light by the succession of states define a journey. Combined to the presence of individuals in sufficient numbers to constitute a flock, the tale is shaped as a migration.

 

Highly Successful (Poorly Executed)

Every day I carry a wrench every day I wait for us to break

My hands are too sore, worn, tired to turn this wrench anymore

Is it too selfish to sing as we all fall apart?

Just take refuge in sleep

Keep moving in dreams

Like walking on kites

Tread lightly sleep soundly

Build sunburned walls

To hold off woodward crisis

They want proof

They want to see something

Worth leaving stone habits

Turn back and run

Back to your mother

Hide in womb you'll never see a sunrise again

And I swear

I'll never let them break through these walls again

And if it takes the rest of my life

I will burn every bridge until every knot that ties me to you

Is broken

Lost with no sense of direction

A few dried hands dragging through sand

Like a mirage, hope soon comes back to life

Is it selfish to sing while we all fall apart

                Fatalism, or the impending doom. The opportunity to escape may be past. Instead of forcing a change, one may "take refuge in sleep" where a better world can be built. Meanwhile, the world left behind is one filled with lack of motivation or plain ill will, where the burden of proof lies on the shoulders of those opposed to the "stone habits". Emphasis is placed on the idea of an escape as it is recommended to turn back, never wake up, and remain in hiding. A defeating hopelessness would prevail, were it not for the protection offered. The hiding place will be kept secret as one wages battle, prepared to give their life for the preservation of another.

                An advice to "tread lightly" repeated with peaceful sleep as a reward. The repetition also appears in the "sunburned walls" and the breaking down of walls. On its previous occurrence, the sunburn applied to entire cities, whereas it is more specifically applying to walls, in this instance. If dreams are associated to the night because of the moment in the day when one typically sleeps, then the sunburns would be associated to daytime and, therefore, to reality. The idea the "proof" and concrete evidence is demanded supports the down-to-earth essence of the sphere. The idea is also supported by the image of the "wrench", which refers to work or a daily chore. Dreams are presented as a means to escape the opposite realm of the cruel, harsh reality. The walls are positioned as protectors, keeping an assailant at bay. A sanctuary takes shape. A descent into a virtual reality, losing all "sense of direction", or an ascent to a higher state of consciousness?

                In parallel, death is also opposed to life, as limited legions of "dried hands" symbolize a state of transition into a hopeful rebirth. Ironically, this regeneration would occur in a crumbling setting. A multi-dimensional opposition. The collage of opposites instills an atmosphere of chaos and battle.

 

Ear to the Rail (Eyes to the Horizon)

Weary of flight

Wings out of sync

Weary of sharp teeth

How thick is skin?

Calamity rising

River overflowing, cleansing the face of man

You better run run run as low as you can

There's no better time to escape with your skin

I know I've said it in the past

I'll always be your friend

But now I have seen all the people you can be

Swept away in water through ruins

 

                The journey to escape is a long one as fatigue drives one to exhaustion, wondering where the breaking point lies. This time, however, the picture painted of devastation draws on more personal colors as it refers to the hypocrisy in relationships. Loyalty is offered in return for betrayal as friendship is promised although there are antecedents of breaking trust. One appears to not follow their own advice as the suggestion to flee and avoid detection as much as possible is repeated while they are setting themselves up for a fall by associating with untrustworthy people. War drives a wedge in a community, dividing what was once united into two parties adamant in their beliefs to a point where they are willing to extinguish life.

                If the "calamity rising" is the "river overflowing, cleansing the face of man", that would imply the world is washed in soiled waters. The water level recedes, seeping through the remains. Means to an end. Fighting fire with fire. In order to conceive the killing of a murderer to be justified and righteous, one has to be convinced of the underlying causes, ethics, and morals.

                Drawing upon previous images of battle, the "sharp teeth" could constitute weapons, while the thickness of skin could refer to an armor. Capitulation in the face of defeat is not in the cards as the favored plan is to flee with a characterization through the use of "run", "flight" and "escape". Defeat, however, is not the death of ideals and principles.

 

Endship

Take your scale and blindfold

Weigh the blood and the ash

Watch the angst and sorrow

Pour from our hands

Stop

Inhale; exhale

Clear view of mind

Movement on coast catching his eye

E-N-D carved across her bow

Hidden in fog

 

                Justice personified enters the stage to weigh in on the justice of the catastrophe, after the fact. The "blindfold" and the "fog" are more evocative of the opposite of justice. The "blood", the "ash", the "angst", the "sorrow" emphasize the negative condition of the surroundings and the state of the protagonist. What good is justice once the damage is done? The image appears to be closer to a bulldozer. Following themes of battle and escape, the blindfold suggests a capture.

                Recited in a format reminiscent of a recipe for disaster. Instructions for inequality. The tone, almost a pleading one, in the perspective of a self-appointed spokesperson for the victims on the receiving end. Prisoners at the pronouncing of their sentence. Resolved through to the end. The clarity coming to those reaching their end.

                References to a "coast" and a "bow" allude to a maritime theme with land in sight. It could also be reversed to represent a ship landing to pick up passengers. The prisoners would embark and be carried to their prison, if interpreted in the realm of reality, or their Grey Haven, if interpreted in more spiritual terms, and their sentence was death. The evocation of the end locates the audience somewhere in the second half of the migration, perhaps closer to the final stages.

 

Make. Use. Hope.

You looked to me with disappointed eyes

You wrapped these words around my neck,

Just because you're breathing, doesn't mean you're living

Your memory is an anchor

And I am drowning

You look to me

With disappointed eyes

From barren landscape

Just because you're breathing doesn't mean you're living

Horizons are red

Sleep when we're dead

This is my "fuck you" for the last time.

I'm returning the mark of a city that has left me in pieces: a city I gave everything

to. The color in my skin to fill its empty sky, the youth in my face, the glow of my

body -gone.

This is my fuck you for the last time

There is no starting over

These ruins are bricks

To lay foundation

 

                Resilience in the face of judgement and disappointment. The wrath of the condemned directed at the judges. Refusing to bear the burden the world has tried to lay on one's shoulders. As if it would legitimize its weight if everyone shared the same suffocating conceptions. What if one were to refuse? What then? Does the burden fall back on their original shoulders or does it float, in limbo? As long as it has shoulders to lay upon, the burden will be allowed to be projected on those opposed. Thinking in mythological terms, the community supporting the burden could be depicted as Atlas, supporting the weight of the world. Recruiting people to their community would lessen the weight of the charge. Therein may lie their sole jealous motivation. It is only fair if everyone shares the less than optimal condition. Similarly to Henry Rollins' bullshit decorators, they have to paint every wall with their excrements so that no one escapes being miserable. Knowing everyone suffers through the same elements disintegrates any possibility of difference and this certainty cements the position that something is acceptable, however aggravating, because nothing else exists. Disappointment is mirrored, as the living status one appears to have been taking for granted is questioned with defiance.

                The facade of the status can only be effective if recognized. One looking "with disappointed eyes / From barren landscapes", by projecting their own assessment of their reality on one that does not subscribe to the same views, creates a dichotomy where the two universes exist in parallel. As long as failure in agreement persists, they will never converge. Social hierarchy cannot be rearranged according to such parameters. One's disappointment, therefore, has no more value than the emotional one the target, in contemplation, may confer to it.

                Images of the sea through the use of the terms "anchor" and "drowning" combined to the theme of the journey relied upon in previous songs supposes an end in sight, either in the form of a landing or a drowning. The idea may be supported when considering the scars apparently used to fuel one's progression, the self-confessed emptiness of the tank, defined as "the mark of a city that has left me in pieces" and "the glow of my body -gone", as well as the repeated use of the word "last".

 

...To those Who Sailed these Seas Before Us

It's been years of drifting endlessly in dark; no light

Where is grace? Where is bond? This stone swan a poltergeist

(I've lost all touch, I've lost everyone)

(And I wonder if it is possible)

Pluck all feathers let skin become thinner

(I'm not sure who's given up on who)

(For my heart to be this hard?)

But bare body flaws the sense of worth and doubt soon lingers

(How am I still alive with my guts tied into knots?)

These arms are anchors they have no features

(How is it possible for this burn to be so hot?)

These ribs are bursting from a skinny worthless creature

(How is it possible for your voice to travel so far?)

It's been years of drifting endlessly in dark; no light

 

Hollow to be buoyant in this vast sea, thick entire

Wind to whip these crests to kiss our face

Currents to drive us tired

Fuck these wings they melted when we rose above the trees

Wax still clings to flesh; feathers coloring the breeze

This will be the last time I try

This will be the last time I try

 

I'll trade these innards for a set of oars

Paddle hard; paddle towards; I still have life; I still want more

Let the waves sweep

Let the currents pull us in tow

Knots fray, black swallowed weight

Pull us in tow

                At the end of the rope. The guard is down, as a fighter at the end of a bout. A featherless bird exposed to the elements and incapacitated, to some extent. An emphasis is placed on the biological toll of the journey, with references to the lost sense of touch, thin skin, hardened heart, flawed body, tied up guts, heavy arms, bursting ribs, vocal cords, and innards up for trade. The devastation that used to affect the surroundings has started to attack one. The proposed solution is to trade whatever can be salvaged and move on, for as long as one has life, for one last time, to wherever "the currents pull us in tow".

                A certain assessment of factual self in comparison to one perceived and the resulting disbelief. Everyone is lost but the way in which it happened is impossible to determine. A ghost from the past haunts one, in the form of an echo from a vague source. Self-perception is generating doubt. By plucking the feathers that allowed one to take flight and attempt at freedom, one concedes and affirms the quasi-impossibility of the venture. Forsaking the wings does not necessarily an expression of regret, however, as the subsequent and perhaps final attempt are being sketched. In addition, a certain optimism grows through the wreckage of defeat, as the buoyancy is assessed as practical in the preservation of life.  

                Even though loneliness is established with the statement that everyone is out of reach, the use of the first-person plural invalidates the idea. The "currents to drive us tired" and "pull us in tow". An argument could be made that it refers to the personification of a memory, or of "those who sailed the seas before us", that will accompany one on the next phase of their journey.  The previous song stated there was "no starting over", therefore, this next phase is initiated with baggage. The theme of the cycle presents itself as the most important aspect of the tale, as the new beginning implies a repetition of the same outcomes. A roll of the dice to determine whether the glass is half-full or if there even was a glass to begin with. Endship turns into beginship.

 

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